What It’s Like To Have Crippling Anxiety

I have anxiety, and it’s not fun.

Everyone’s anxiety is different, and even though I take medication, my anxiety is severe.

My thoughts are consumed with fear of everything possibly going wrong. And when I say everything, I mean everything from failed projects at work to nuclear war.

Most of the time, I don’t want to leave the house unless I have to.

I start crying for no apparent reason.

My sex life has gone down the tubes because even though I want to have sex with my partner, there’s always an ongoing fear of rejection, and sadness.

Of course it’s hard for your partner to find you sexy when you’re crying in her lap all the time.

I’m tired all the time, because my body is always in fight or flight mode.

You constantly have thoughts like, “I can’t do this anymore,” but you don’t know what “this” is. Is it my job? Is it the inactivity? Am I suicidal?

You constantly ask people to reassure you that everything is ok, and then when they do, you don’t believe them.

Every new email triggers a panic. Every new issue raised inspires fear about how I will overcome my own emotions to get it done.

Nothing works, especially not me.

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